JotBlog

It was that same snowboarding pro who Kenworthy ultimately decided not to kiss after claiming his silver medal in Sochi, as part of an American clean sweep at the event.

Twenty-four hours later, it was Valentine's Day. Kenworthy and his fellow medallists did the media rounds together - where the questions focused on one thing.

"Literally every interview was about girls and crushes and types," he says.

"I was in the closet so, to all intents and purposes, I was straight. And it was all like: 'Who are these three heartthrobs from the Games? What's their type? Who's their dream date?'

"It was really focused, and I just didn't know how to navigate it. And in interviews, I often felt like I was dodging questions or lying by omission a little bit - but now, I was suddenly just lying, and I hated myself for it.

"That tour after a medal, when you've just achieved your dream and are getting all this validation and congratulations… it was actually the worst for me. I considered killing myself because I couldn't imagine waking up and just lying all day."

Torn between his sexuality and his sport, Kenworthy resolved to walk away from skiing, until his agent convinced him there was another way.

"I wanted to be out and live my truth, and go to gay bars and do these things that I hadn't been able to do," he says. "He told me I didn't have to quit skiing to do that - but there was no blueprint for me to examine, because no-one had been out before me.

"And not just in skiing, but in snowboarding, BMX, motocross, mountain-biking - all these sports, and there had never been anyone who was out.

"And the idea of them is that they are counter-culture and edgy; and I felt that if I came out, I would no longer be cool in the eyes of my sport, and I would lose what I had built for myself.

"I felt like being gay would be detrimental to those things, because no-one had done that."

But Kenworthy decided to do it anyway.

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